Log in

No account? Create an account


Dreams are what you wake up from.

14 years of Livejournalling, and hopefully, more to come.

Previous Entry Share Next Entry

(no subject)

:: Halving the Kingdom ::

One menza quiz that was never erased from my memory was the one about the king and his kingdom. It goes like this:
"If you're the king and you are about to leave your kingdom to your two sons, how can you divide the kingdom such that both parties will be satisfied with their portion?"
That quiz really got me thinking for a while.

I've kept a diary since I was thirteen, and have continued to do so till now.
And I have them all with me.
Except for a particular year; I was taking the train towards Narita back to Singapore.
I was in a rush and forgot my bag and the diary inside it.
And so a year's worth of memories, meaningless to anyone else, was lost forever.
Notwithstanding, the diarying prevailed and went on till 24 Dec 2001, when echester passed me an account. (thank you!)
Hence, the transition into something more virtual.

921 entries later, I wonder where I am now.
Looking through the cryptic entries that only mean something to me and those that share that certain moment, I cannot help but wonder if I should start a diary once more.
Livejournal, or blogging, for all its virtues cannot replace the privacy of a diary containing the innermost thoughts.
Yeah, there is the private option and blah blah but it is simply not the same.

And in this blogging world, we cannot run away from the fact that we are judged for more than what we write.
The moment someone knows me and the blog that I pen my thoughts down, the comments that are registered are directed to me, and not the writer.
I will never know.

It's like leaving comments to this unknown person's blog/livejournal until you realise that he or she is actually Nicole Kidman.
Will the comments you leave ever be the same again?
Hence my inclination to divide the kingdom and embark on my little experiment.

Let's see what happens.

And for the answer to the quiz, before I forget:
The king made one son divide the kingdom while the other gets to choose first.
He must have been a wise king.
Oh well. Yawn Yawn.

  • 1
That's amazing - you've really kept track of all your years... (Kinda reminds me of Butterfly Effect)... Sometimes I wished I had kept journals since way back then too...

And Livejournal and online blogs are inherently different from personal diaries... Online, I think everyone tends to write with an audience in mind, and that of course may mean the person can never voice his deepest innermost thoughts... But at least there's a sounding board. Neither method is perfect but the two does complement each other well...

erm, there's ljarchive.
i'm surprised i've written so few entries, and in a decreasing frequency.

it's funny you should mention this example because i heard the exact same story in my game theory class last week, except the scenario painted was one in which a mother was trying to divide a cake between her 2 sons. My professor's israeli, so it was rather comical when he was relating the story in his hilarious accent "rememba in game tiooo-riii (theory), da boys are trying to skrrroooo (screw) each other over the kak (cake)".

All it all it was a pretty nice introduction to Nash equilibria, until the professor started pulling all this algebra and math out of his ass to explain the boys' behavior; thats when things started getting hairy and i got frickin lost and bewildered. haha.

"He must have been a wise king."
- i like your answer so much better; come and take over from my prof leh!

i like the prisoners dilemma as well. it's an evergreen.
pass me the application form!

echester was the one who gave me my LJ account too, never denied I did started it because I wished through reading me, I could get into his good books.

Today, I guess you've read me say countless times - how LJ is always written bounded by the fact of an Audience reading and what you can or cannot write. And so my journey out to do the opposite, to write what most people would never dare, my darkest secrets, my most unappealing aspects of life.

Of course, you can see how people will tend to agree with those they like, then those they don't, when the same thoughts are shared.

Happy Lunar New Year

Happy CNY to you as well, dudey.

The point about writing your innermost thoughts is that doing that doesn't warrant true friendship. People would still have to agree with your innermost thoughts. Of course the most ideal situation is for someone to reveal his or her innermost thoughts and then have people agreeing. It's a leap of faith, but at least you're not lying to yourself.

in mind of the 'audience', i'm glad i started blogging somewhere else where it's personal and i can write what i want.


and i have to resist commenting for fear you'll find out.

Two cents worth of comment

To me i feel that as everyone grow older they would start wearing a mask. A mask to hide themselves just to blend into the society to be like everyone else.For the fear of being judge and also the fear of hurting people for we care and loved.
A journal is a space, whereby we could take off our mask and show our true self to the friends or family who we really are.Its only the ones who would care about you would take the time and effort to visit your blog now and then just to know how you are doing.
Think of this...
If you were the king and the blog/live journal is your kingdom.One of you son is your true self and the other is the one wearing the mask.How would you divide the kingdom in order to for it to be fair?

Re: Two cents worth of comment

i can't divide, for i no longer know the difference between wearing a mask and not wearing it. it's the same persona.

That's a very good answer.
I'm just glad I don't have to think so much about it.

I wonder whoever that found your diary and read it ... if he or she ever fell in love with you.

Hahah :D

ni bu yao shuo ar, i really like him.

though reading his blog is like reading

a certain lj i came across always has its comments options turned off

its up to you really
leave it on if you can take it =)

I was just having a good chat with my best friend the day before and I was saying that ultimately, the world of blogging, has an audience in mind. Unwittingly, you are conscious on the fact that an audience will be present, and will attempt to decipher who you really are.

How do you want to be portrayed?
Do you want to be portrayed?

My best friend keeps both a blog and a diary... And I think that is sound and sane. Blogging in its current form, cannot replace a diary.

Furthermore, the power of one's written script... How it evolves, how it varies on a daily basis, makes it a grand narrative of one's life isn't it?

I notice I always have chats with my best/close friends... about things like that...

Quite wierd really.

there are some who treasure their thoughts as privtae, there are some who shares their thoughts with others... no matter what it is, it is your choice. And whatever it is, we will be there when oyu feel like re-engaging again...

if u r one of the king's son, would you want to divide or get to choose 1st?


There will be chaos if any kingdom is halved. Read The Romance of Three Kingdoms?

It seems to me that many ppl (including our own friends) would think LJ/blogs are a good avenue to know a person, and that by reading about his life/thoughts, they assume they can figure him out or understand him well. It's not a wrong behavior but it's not accurate.

I think this is apparent when you keep a personal diary elsewhere, and ppl (not knowing that private side) take this LJ persona to be whom you really are, as a whole. How then do you cope with this?

One thing though, i think that the cryptic way you post sorta sends out a clear message against such tendency.

Btw, what if the king has 3 sons? Who gets to choose first? :P hehe...

  • 1